A 21st Century Satire

With politics seeming to put a damper on everything today, I decided instead to start writing about something amusing. Here I present a very short(and incomplete) satire of what I imagine goes through the minds of the generation before my own(Mine being millennials)

 

*****

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In a small apartment in suburban America, two friends sat idly chatting about the times. One, who we will call Cecil, rambled incessantly about his many annoyances with the world. The other, Drew, sat scrolling through his phone, giving an occasional nod to show he was indeed still mentally present.

“I tell you, I saw this video the other day about how this newest generation is ruining our country, and it’s an outrage!” Cecil screamed, spittle flying from his mouth and very nearly missing his companion. “These damn kids, with all their new age ideas and not one bit of respect for their elders. I swear I’d be dead is it weren’t for this pacemaker; their mannerisms very nearly give me heart attacks.”

Drew looked up from his phone and nodded, speaking for the first time all afternoon. “It really is a shame to see the state of things these days.” With a nod from Cecil, he returned his gaze down. The first stood up from his chair and paced around the room, uttering profanities under his breath. How could the world have changed, he thought, how dare it change. If it was meant to change then his generation should have been responsible for it, not this new stock of utterly disrespectful children who couldn’t even leave their mommies long enough to buy a juice box!

But alas, good old fashioned morality was on the decline and capitalism was failing. The entire concept of the American dream had faded into what now seemed a distant memory. It used to be that you could visit your favorite chain restaurant in almost 20 different local areas but now all that seemed to be emerging were independently owned “natural” selections that made him sick. How could anyone enjoy life anymore without fast food. Instead people were now forced to resort to Sally tree huggers organically grown fish sticks. It was all just ludicrous.

 

*****

     And that is what I imagine to be the inner ramblings of middle aged men who are so against the new generation. If you like it please share and have an amazing day.

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